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The Hobbit Animated Clip

Journal Entry: Thu Dec 18, 2014, 3:28 PM


You know, I have thought about actually doing a review of the 1977 animated film by Rankin-Bass.  Which is superior to that OTHER animated Hobbit Film from 1966.

But, here is the problem, I have the DVD of the Hobbit, and not its original VHS.  And this is why that's a problem.  The audio on the DVD has been butchered.  As in spliced and cut up.  Sliced to bits.  Most of the audio sound effects aren't even in the DVD.

So anyone who has never seen the animated Hobbit prior to the DVD release are missing a great deal of stuff.

Well, I do have a treat for all of you.  Consider this a Hanukkah from me to all of you.

It took me like almost a decade, but I managed to piece together the original VHS Hi-Fi audio with the clean cut DVD's HD look.

And I posted it on my Drive account.

Conversation with Smaug Original Audio


They shouldn't get that pissed at me for this.

This is the original Hi-Fi audio in with the DVD of the animated Hobbit, produced by Rankin-Bass and animated by Studio Ghibli.  Yes, THAT Studio Ghibli.

And it shows the unique design of Smaug for the animated film...the one that I do prefer to use when I draw him.  No offense to those who like PJ's version of Smaug...I just like this one a bit better.  

Unfortunately, I can't give a proper review of the animated film because the DVD's audio bugs the shit outta me.  But at least you can actually enjoy the original audio, which includes a lot of animal growls Richard Boone did for Smaug...and done WITHOUT any filtering.  Also, the sound of Smaug's diving when he's attacking Laketown, sounds like a nuclear bomb dropping.  It's this ear-splitting whistling sound.  It's perfect.  You hear that whistling sound and then look up to see the sky on fire by a giant red-golden dragon with a pissed off warg face and you're runnin' the fuck outta there.

And yes, my fellow Nerds, that IS Thundercracker as Bard the Bowman.  And he shoots Smaug.  So we do have that bit of awesome.

Smaug is played by Richard Boone, the guy most famous for playing Paladin from Have Gun, Will Travel.  He's also played Joe Friday's partner on Dragnet, and even had a variety show on cable TV.  

Bilbo is played by Orson Bean, who was on Scrubs once.  He's done a lot of bit parts for TV shows here and there and mostly is a writer for programs rather than an actor.

So, there we go.

And...

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  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
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My Summary of the Battle of Five Armies

Journal Entry: Thu Dec 18, 2014, 6:16 AM


So, let me get this straight. Magneto...

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gets saved by a communist Russian dominatrix...

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 Dracula...

 photo christopher-lee-dracula_zpsee0377ea.jpg 

Agent Smith...

 photo Hugo-Weaving-Agent-Smith-The-Matrix_zps6232d272.gif

and the Seventh Doctor...

 photo seventh-doctor-217x300_zps0d68d156.jpg

And Dr. Watson pissed off Inspector Sherlock Holmes...

 photo sherlock3_2758892b_zpsd728b138.jpg

who then ransack and burned a boating community...

 photo theplacidaharbourclub-boat-basin_zps77d8032f.jpg

only to be shot in the heart by…Vlad the Impaler.

 photo Luke-Evans-Vlad-the-Impaler-Dracula-Untold-Movie_zpsc542e47a.jpg

What movie was I watching again?

 photo TheHobbit_zps32644e33.png

Ahhhhh....

Really?  I was watching the Hobbit this whole time?



  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
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  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Battle of Five Armies

Journal Entry: Tue Dec 16, 2014, 10:05 PM


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Pink Square Bullet Spoilers!Pink Square Bullet 


Okay, let's do this.

I just got back from it, and well, unfortunately the theater I was in had an issue with the 3D projector, everything wouldn't line up, so I ended up missing like nearly half the film and got only blurry images with the 3D glasses and the sound.

So, lucky for me I get a rain check card and I will attempt to see it again either tomorrow or Thursday to truly give you the review you all want.

But I did manage to see a lot of the more important parts of the movie.  Unfortunately, a lot of the blurry bits happened during the chapter of Fire and Water, in which Smaug burned Laketown.  

Yeah, that made me sad.

However, in this film, Smaug talks to Bard.

I swear to god, Peter Jackson has been reading my fics.  I'm serious.  I did the same thing with my version of how Smaug came to the Shire.  He talked to Bard.  And in the revisal, he talks to Bard again.

In the movie, Smaug actually lands on the town and starts basically turning Laketown into friggin Tokyo!

He literally looked like Godzilla crushing houses and all that shit.

This is Old School Godzilla.  LOL!

But like I said, a lot of that was very blurry.  But it was just so silly.  And again, I have to say PJ's been reading my shit, because Smaug literally hands himself over to Bard.  He doesn't even make it difficult, he just lands and moves towards Bard, with his chest out as it to say: "Whatcha gonna do about it?  Come at me bro!"

And then he lunges, ready to eat Bard and his son Bain, Bard fires the arrow...and Smaug chokes...and the noises he's making sounds like he was suffering from autoerrotic asphyxiation.  And that's how he died.  

But not before falling on the Master of Laketown who had all that gold in his boat.

LOL.

Of course, Smaug from Lord of the Rings of a Different Sort had another reason of handing himself to Bard, it was to basically fake his death.  That arrow did nothing to him.  It hurt, but it didn't do anything to him.

So, Smaug's now dead and everyone from Laketown meets up on the shores heading for Dale.  They were going to basically rebuild Dale because well, Laketown is kinda under water now and got a dragon corpse sitting on top of it.

And Alfrid.  Oh god, he's a sniveling asshole, trying to get on Bard's good side when everyone cheered and started calling Bard king.  Bard of course wanted nothing of it...which again is a part of what the Book said!

That's right, Bard turned down the title because Dale never had a King, it had a Lord.  
So, again, it does like Desolation of Smaug it does follow the books.  The big difference is Tauriel, Kili, Flili, Oin, and Bofur are with her.  And then Legolas showed up later.

He basically tells Tauriel to follow him, and she does, but not after Kili gives her his rune stone, for luck.  Cuz he's in love with her.  And she's kinda in love with him?  Like I said, I like Tauriel, I'm glad she's in the movie, and I gave my reasons for it a year ago, but the shoehorned romance is stupid.  But like Linkara said, it at least gives one of the dwarves something to do beyond being identified by the color of his hood.

I do agree with that.

Spinning Crystal Pixel 

She and Legolas go chase down where the orcs are.  Apparently they're in Angmar.  You know, the home of the Witchking of Angmar?  Agmar, which is located roughly a thousand miles north of Rivendell, on the west side of the Misty Mountains.

*smacks head*

HOW THE FUCK DID THEY TRAVEL THAT FAR FROM EREBOR?!

Okay, how do we explain this?

I know.  Smaug gave Tauriel a ride to Agmar while went south towards Dol Guldur to fuck up Sauron's shit.  

That didn't really happen in the movie, but that's how I'm gonna hand wave it...which is why this stupid fanfic I had been working on for a year exists.  Because there are holes in the movie.  Guess who fills them?

Smaug's Fire by Ghostwalker2061


Fuck yeah, he does!  Smaug's my plot-hole patcher.

He's gonna tear this shit apart once he scares Sauron away.

Okay, so the two elves go to Angmar.  Which was literally next door to Erebor.

I'm guessing.  There's a lot of time skips in this movie.  I suppose this is taking place over like a couple of months.  There were time skips in the book as well.  I mean, Bilbo was gone a year, but it didn't feel like it.  At least in the movie, as the seasons changed, we could see the passage of time.

So, the Battle of Five Armies...it happens in...November 23, Third Age 2941...

*smack*

Smaug died in October...I guess.

You know, it really wasn't clear in the book either just how long after Smaug's death the battle happened.  Thorin and Co. stayed in the mountain for weeks...and during that time, Thranduil showed up to lend aid to the Men of Long Lake.

Which he did both in the movie and in the book.  Oh, and I spied like several Game of Thrones references in the movie.  And I laughed my ass off. Bard saying Winter is Coming.  Bard asking about Alfrid's Nights Watch...

That was hilarious.  

And Thranduil does this for the reason of getting his pretty diamonds and necklaces back from Erebor.  And he understands that the Men of Dale and Laketown have stuff that belongs to them in the mountain, so he agrees to lend aid to them in exchange for their help in his needs.

Reasonable.  That's what happens in the book.

Bard decides to try and reason with Thorin, yes, that happens in the book as well.  And Thorin being a greedy ass now, tells Bard to fuck off.

And Bilbo having the Arkenstone, decides to go down there and give them both a leverage up on Thorin.  Thorin also sends word to Dain in the Iron Hills because he knows basically 13 dwarves against army of probably ten thousand pissed off elves and humans...well it's not gonna look pretty.

So, that part follows the book very well.  And Thorin succumbing to the Dragon's Sickness, as a representation of Smaug actually infesting his mind.  That was a neat trick.  Hell he even said some of Smaug's lines.  Like: "I will not part with a single coin."  And he hisses like Smaug as well.

Spinning Crystal Pixel 

I actually thought for a moment I heard Smaug talking through Thorin.

They handled that fairly well.  He slowly goes mad with the greed, wanting to board himself up in the mountain, refusing to lend any aid to anyone.  Not trusting anyone.  All that.  He thinks everyone's out to get him.  Paranoia and such.  Good play from Richard Armitage on that.  Nicely done.  It got really creepy at times.

Well, finally Bilbo goes down, gives them the Arkenstone, which they use to try and barter for their share of the treasure.  Thorin, who's lost his mind now, doesn't even believe it's the real Arkenstone until Bilbo said it was.  He gets pissed, shouts at Bilbo, nearly kills the poor guy until Gandalf stops him and tells him to "return his Burglar"  

And then Dain shows up with the army of Iron Hill Dwarves and we get the beginning of the Battle of Five Armies...right now three armies are present.

Iron Hill Dwarves, verses the combined might of Men and Wood Elves.  And I have to love Dain.  Oh my god, he was great!  Especially when he called Thranduil a strutting pixie.  

"If you all wouldn't mind...I'd like you all to SOD OFF!"

Fuck yeah, dudes, just Fuck yeah.

That's Billy Connolly playing that part.

That was perfect.

Well, speaking of Gandalf.  We get his bit when he's in Dol Guldur.  He's sitting there, whispering his spells with Azog taunting him.  That is until Kate Blanchett, aka Galadriel shows up and fucks some shit over.  Not only does she like kick some ass here and there, but apparently she's like Wonder Woman or something, because the  next scene she's shown actually CARRYING Gandalf in her friggle arms.  How strong is Galadriel?  I don't seem to recall super strength being a power of the Elves.

But apparently, Galadriel is strong enough to pick up a 200 pound man and carry him up the stairs.

She's ate her Wheaties before she showed up.  Then we get Sauron showing up to screw everyone over, the Nine, the Nazgûl showing up in their ghostly forms.  And then Dracula, I mean Saruman, Agent Smith...I mean Elrond...both show up with the Seventh Doctor...I mean Radagast...coming to Magneto's...I mean Gandalf's rescue.  

Galadriel isn't looking too well though, expending too much of her power to fight Sauron off.  Which actually now allows us to SEE why the Elves go to the Undying Lands at the end of the Lord of the Rings.  Galadriel is literally wasting away, becoming weaker and weaker the more she expels her power to fight Sauron.  The elves fading is like...a battery dying.  A battery that's not rechargeable.  A car battery.  Once it's used up, it's gone.

So pretty much by the time Frodo and everyone show up to meet Galadriel, she's pretty much running on empty.  If she didn't leave, she would have well...suffer a fate worse than death, basically becoming a shade...it's like a death for an elf.  That's how they die.  They become these nothing ghosts left to endure on with no end.  And no power.

And the fight there, well, it reminded me of the Power Rangers.  And I loved it.  Saruman kicking ass and taking names.  This is why he is so powerful and why he was feared when he turned against everyone.

Galadriel goes into her Dark Lady mode, which is part of her condition of "fading" she pretty much nearly becomes a wraith herself and pushes Sauron away with the last of her power before falling over.  Sauron flees east...and Saruman follows him.

Which we kinda guess what happens next.  Right?  Yeah...it's obvious.  Sauron pretty much godes Saruman to join his side.

So Gandalf goes back to Erebor and warns both Bard and Thranduil about the orcs.  Thranduil is pissed off at Tauriel because she didn't come back when she was supposed to.  So she's banished.  Legolas pretty much tells his father to fuck off...so he's banished.

And Thorin gets over his greed to fight the good fight, after the friggin battle against the two extra armies, the Wargs and Orcs from Dol Guldur show up.

Gandalf of course says that the reason why Sauron wanted Erebor because of its strategic location, giving access to Angmar and Arnor.  Lothlorien, Rivendell...yeah...that's why he set Thorin on his mission to flush Smaug out.

And also to keep Smaug, the giant Morgoth created Nuclear Bomb out of Sauron's hands.

That's why he had to die.  

Well, Azog's having fun...Kili and Fili decide to help Thorin go up and face Azog and Bolg.  Bolg was actually in the book.  Azog wasn't, he was mentioned, but didn't play any actual part in the book.

Well, so long, long battle that reminded me of a combination of The Two Towers and The Return of the King.  Bilbo gets the idea to put on the Ring and find Thorin to warn him of the orcs from Angmar showing up.  These are the Misty Mountain orcs.

And how Azog gets his troops into the battlefield was really awesome.  He used giant worms to bore holes into the hills so his troops could go inside the tunnels and come out on the other side.  These worms don't fight, they just create the tunnels and leave.  And we get giant trolls...in daylight...*smack* but still, excellent usage of the trolls.

Legolas faces down Bolg with Orcrist.  Tauriel watches as Azog kills Fili.  And then Kili gets killed next.  And she's all in tears afterwards, after just killing the orc who  killed him.

Bilbo warns Thorin, Thorin goes after Azog now.  He gets Orcrist back after Legolas throws Orcrist at one of the orcs attacking him.  And they have a nice fight on a river of ice, over a frozen waterfall.  

But eventually Thorin does die.  He dies, allowing Azog to stab him so he could get a closer reach and stab him with Orcrist.

And when Bilbo comes to his side, Thorin does say the important line, well, an abridged version of it.

"If people valued food and cheer over hoarded gold, then this would be a merrier world."

He learns his lesson, and dies.  

And then we get this scene with Bilbo and Gandalf sitting on a ledge...and in some ways, I'm reminded of King of the Hill.  I was expecting both to just say: "Yep."

You have to see the scene to get what I mean.  Them sitting in silence, overwhelmed by EVERYTHING, and Gandalf taking out his pipe and trying to light it.  

Well, so that bit ends.  Bilbo and Gandalf both leave, but not before Bilbo tells the remaining company of dwarves he traveled with: "If you're ever in the neighborhood...tea is at 4pm...and you're all welcome to come and join me.  Don't bother to knock."

So he goes home, and Gandalf leaves Bilbo right at the Shire.  This is different from the books.  In the book, Gandalf walks Bilbo right to his home.  Here, Bilbo goes on alone from there.

And Gandalf says: "I know you found a magic ring in the Misty Mountains.  And magic rings should not be taken lightly."

Of course Bilbo lies and says he dropped it...and I had a feeling Gandalf knew he was lying because Gandalf is one of the bearers of the three Elven Rings.  So, he's not that easily fooled.  

But that was also different from the book.  In the book, Thorin and the dwarves all knew Bilbo had his magic ring.  Gandalf knew Bilbo had the magic ring.  But at the time, none of them realized it was the One Ring.

But when he does return, he finds his house being auctioned off.  We even see Lobelia Baggins of the Sackville-Bagginses showing up to take some of his stuff.  Bilbo argues with them, he manages to get some of them to stop, but when he walks in, his house is in a wreck, worse than what he left it when the dwarves came in.

And it ends with Bilbo looking at the One Ring, it then time shifts 60 years and we are back at the start of the first movie...Fellowship of the Ring, with Gandalf knocking at the door to wish him a happy birthday.

What did I think, while yeah, there were some holes here and there, but again it was a fun ride.  I was following it all through.  I laughed when I laughed, I cried when I cried.  So I enjoyed every minute of it.

I will go back again to re-watch it in 3D because of the issue of the projector.  So I can't really give a review on how well the 3D was yet.  Due to the projector in my theater screwing up.  But I will say when the projector did work, the 3D looked good.

And I have a problem with 3D due to my glasses and my eyes, and I could see it fine.

So I do recommend this one to go see everyone.

And if any of you wish to read this stupid story that I had been writing since Desolation of Smaug, well...it's going to be titled The Unexpected Friendship.  Because I'm that cheesy.  

Smaug Smiles by Ghostwalker2061

But I did have fun at the movies.




  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
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Interview with Smaug

Journal Entry: Mon Dec 15, 2014, 10:07 PM




You know, since I'll be going to the movie tonight, I might as well do another review.

That is of Stephen Colbert INTERVIEWING FUCKING SMAUG!  I am serious, this isn't like an interview of Smaug's voice actor Benedict Cumberbatch, and we see clips of the two films Smaug was in...no...no...it's Smaug!

The best seven and a half minutes I've ever watched.

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Of course I was laughing my head off when I first saw it.  I just went insane with this.  God damn it is this good!

Stephen introduces Smaug, looks behind him and the dragon's not sitting down at the table.  Give it a moment, Smaug comes bursting through the wall!  Behind him is just blackness and we can kinda see sparks flying, which means the backstage area is probably in a complete wreck.

"Chiefest and Greatest of Calamities is in the House!"

And the crowd goes wild.  This is excellent.

We've learned some new things about Smaug the Golden.  Things I'm sure Tolkien didn't know.

Smaug is a Right Wing conservative.  Though he does have two wings.

He is giving a bumper to Rand Paul because he wants to bring back the gold standard.

And he understands how hard it is for conservative actors to get any jobs.  Which is why he and Kelsey Grammer always are after the same parts.

He ate the damned hostesses from the View!  I guess he got stuffed on Whoopi Goldberg.

Smaug hates Toothless and the dragons from Game of Thrones, because they're a bunch of sellout and he digs it old school style dragon.  

And Smaug apparently thinks Benedict Cumberbatch is a hack, Martin Freeman is a little man, and sweet, while kinda either sensually or hungrily licking his lips...I'm guessing that's a jab at the Smauglock yaoi fangirls...

You see that, Smauglock yaoi fangirls, Smaug's very much aware of what you've been doing to him!  

And I like the fact that a little bit, Smaug is showing some of Cumberbatch's ADHD in the review.  Yeah, Ben's got ADHD, that's why in interviews he's always looking around, getting his attention drawn to other things.  So, he apparently passed some of that onto his performance as Smaug.  You can tell by how Smaug's looking at the audience a lot, doing a little mugging, that sort of thing.  Smaug's got attention deficit, hyperactive disorder!  

Yay, another dragon with a mental disorder besides Neltharion!  See, Nel, you're not alone in this world.  Smaug's got something wrong with his head too.

And he's the guy who actually did the motion capture for himself.  Go look at the picture in the video, you'll die laughing.

And he wants to eat the audience, TWICE!

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And the way Smaug sees it, he was standing his ground when Bilbo broke into his "house", that being Erebor.

He was offered a role on Sherlock.  Got a lot of giggles from the audience.

And he doesn't know who JRR Tolkien is.  That was META!  I do know that Cumberbatch himself has at least read the books.

Stephen Colbert actually has big time.  He's a huge Tolkien geek, one of the largest.

And we all should call Smaug "dude".  He gave us permission, guys.

Hearing Smaug use slang, it was gold.  I have a feeling if Smaug ever existed in modern times, he would be using some slang a bit here and there.  He's a dragon of languages, in my mind, as in he'll learn lots of languages and various dialects and also the cultural slang.

So the interview ended with Smaug burning the set because Stephen didn't know he should never "Laugh at a live dragon...MOTHERFUCKER!"  That was actually in the book, Bilbo cursing himself for laughing at Smaug when he was running for his life.  Never laugh at a live dragon.  EVER.

Cuz you taste good with ketchup, yo.

There are some issues with the CG and I understand why it's there.  We only see Smaug's right wing-hand...and at times it looks disconnected or coming through the floor.  But it added a level of body language to the dragon, so I excused it.

The only gripe I have was when he was mentioning the gold standard.  Instead of bumping Rand Paul, Smaug should have said this...

"They should bring back the gold standard.  I'm sick and tired of sleeping on mounds of dyed green paper.  One sneeze, and I've lost half my fortune!"

But that's just me.  It would have gotten a lot more laughs, I assure you.  But it's the same gripe i had with Thorin's boast in Desolation of Smaug.

He still should have said: "You want the gold, worm?  Take it!" and then dumped molten gold on Smaug.  Because that's how I would have written that scene.

But go see this video, it's hilarious, and good.  I mean, where was this when we had Draco from Dragonheart...pretty much the only other intelligent talking dragon I can think of being voiced by a sexy, sexy man.

Oh well.


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

The Hobbit 1966 Re-Review

Journal Entry: Mon Dec 15, 2014, 1:09 AM


I thought I go back and redo this old review of mine since well, tomorrow I'll be able to see it on a pre-showing of Battle of Five Armies.

And since it happens on a Tuesday, it means I get to pay only 5 bucks for it.  Because I live in awesome land...sometimes.

First off, I'll go ahead and post the video of it.

It's a 12 minute video, the very first Hobbit adaptation done by Gene Dietz who is known for...the Chuck Jones versions of Tom and Jerry during the time of Animation Ghetto.  

You know, the time when the reason why most characters had collars was so that they could save money on adding the head as a solid piece and turn it without any effort of adding the frames necessary to turn the head.  And just animate the eyes and mouthes.  Kinda like...South Park, during its construction paper days.  

Only these guys didn't get the excuse of using construction paper, they had actual painted cells and each piece of the character was painted on a cell that moved individually.  

It's where we get Flash Animation from.

Example?

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Which was parodied by this...

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Yeah....


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No offense to Chuck Jones, but you don't do a good Tom and Jerry.

So, watch the video...



And now that everyone has watched the video...here we go.

First off, let me say something that I didn't know at the time of the first review of this...eyesore.

In the original draft of JRR Tolkien's The Hobbit, one that was NOT published...because it was a rough, but it was added in the notations on what Tolkien was brainstorming at the time was that Bilbo was supposed to slay Smaug.

Shocking!

Not only was he supposed to slay Smaug, but he used Sting to do it.  He was supposed to shove Sting into the hole in Smaug's armor and stab him that way.  And then he rode the river of dragon blood out of the mountain upon a shield, a harden, and more somber hobbit than he was before.

So this...here...

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Kinda sorta was in the original draft.  Except replace Thorin with Bilbo and the molten gold with Smaug's very hot, near lava temperature blood.

And it still sounds as stupid as you might think.  Thank Cthulhu Tolkien changed it.

But apparently Gene Dietz managed to get ahold of the old draft or something and...kinda adapted it for his 12 minute film.  Except instead of using Sting, Bilbo crafted a Windlass (the giant harpoon shooting mounted crossbow) and shot the Arkenstone, which was in the form of an actual heart, at Smaug's chest.  

Yeah, that means Peter Jackson watched the 12 minute film too.  *groan*

Because that's where the Windlass and the harpoon Black Arrow came from.

But I prefer as it is currently.  Bilbo not slaying Smaug.  Instead it was Bard.  One reason, why should the main character always get the glory?  A lot of times, that doesn't happen in real life.  You don't get the kill, someone else does.

And Bilbo had already proven his bravery many times during the book, so him slaying Smaug was unnecessary.  And he still would have been battle harden from the journey itself.  He doesn't need to slay a dragon to prove to the readers his worth, he's already done that with his cleverness, his loyalty to his friends, and his witty banter in just having a conversation with Smaug.

So for me, the book is stronger without Bilbo slaying Smaug.  

Glad they didn't give Smaug an actual vest made of diamonds.  Or make him scream like a woman in labor.

But still, these guys got a lot wrong.  Dale was never a kingdom.  But it was a part of principality called Rhovanion.  The dwarves held a kingdom inside of Erebor, the Lonely Mountain, and traded with Dale, which both places took great profit from.  

And that was why Smaug came to Erebor, because it had shit that he wanted to steal.  Money.  He's a greedy lizard who wanted something he didn't have, and that's why he went to Erebor.

Or in China, they say: Smaug went horseback riding.

Don't know what that phrase means, check the journal before this one.

Smaug also collected the riches from Dale as well and piled them all up inside Erebor.  So the gold in the mountain didn't just belong to the dwarves, but to the Men of Dale.

So, a piece of what "Slag" does in the 12 minute film was correct.  Because Smaug did also steal riches from Dale.  Actually, what he did was establish a lottery with Dale.  Smaug would first force the Men of Dale to pay him tribute, aka bribe money, so he won't attack their town.  And then when they ran out of that, he most likely demanded maiden sacrifices.  

And then when that was gone, due to many citizens of Dale fleeing south towards Lake Town to get the fuck away from a fire breathing dragon...Smaug at last ransacked the city one more time and took everything they didn't give him.

So there is some truth, but not much.


 photo ScreenShot2013-12-12at111345AM_zpscd8802a5.png

But what they did get wrong was Dale had the Arkenstone.  It did not.  The Dwarves had the Arkenstone.

 photo ScreenShot2013-12-12at111417AM_zps5437d13d.png


I'm guessing of all the adaptations and depictions of Smaug, I have to say that this drawing made by a four-year old, (or rather a stylistic artist who wanted to feel all deep and shit) is probably THE worst depictions of Smaug EVER!

But I will say this...



That is the MOST AWESOME THING I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY FUCKING LIFE!  OH GOD, THIS IS WONDERFUL!  SO MUCH HAPPINESS!

FUCK YEAH!

Smaug: I take your treasure, I drink your MILKSHAKE!

I need a moment.  And a new pair of undies.  

And apparently, we should now call Smaug "Dude".  

The most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my life.  Happiness!  Oh Happiness!  

I can now say that if I die after this, I would have died with a smile on my face.  

And if I had a cock, it would be saluting.

That is gorgeous!

 photo ScreenShot2014-12-15at42537AM_zps872445d0.png

Smaug, baby, you can have my milkshake!

Original Raider.  He invented the raid que!  He's the first ever raid boss in ever!

Step Into the Light by Ghostwalker2061 

Love yah, buddy.  

So awesome.

Fuck the review of Hobbit 1966.  It's shit, and spare yourself the insanity.

But if you want to read the original review of the 1966 film....

The Hobbit (1966)Nearly a decade before Rankin Bass had hired the wonderful animators of Studio Ghibli to create the very movie that gotten me into the world of Middle Earth and Tolkien's writings, there once was another version.
The first!
It was called plainly enough, The Hobbit.


And it was only 12 minutes long.
Well, this story, because it was so short, pretty much stripped everything that was The Hobbit out.
So, we begin our tale in the Kingdom of Dale, that was very rich and golden because of the mines of the Lonely Mountain.  And here is where we get our first incorrect bit of info.  Firstly, Dale wasn't a kingdom, it was pretty much a duchy, most importantly, it was a city.  It was a city of Men that rested only, from what I've seen, short of 10 miles outside the gates of Erebor, the Lonely Mountain.  Erebor was a kingdom of dwarves ruled by Thrór, King Under the Mountain.
Now Esgaroth and Dale were apart of the kingdom of Rhovanion, but that was


There you go.


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Puns banned in China

Journal Entry: Sun Dec 14, 2014, 5:20 PM


So I discovered that China, puns are now banned.

China’s media regulators have put out a new edict to copywriters, directing them to keep their groaners to themselves.

It’s no laughing matter – the State General Administration of Press, Publication, Radio, Film and Television issued an order restricting puns and irregular wordplay on television and in advertising.

The big difference in the Internet age is that the people who have the privilege of creating puns and idioms have changed.- Wang Xiaoyu, former dean of the School of Communications at East China Normal University

The order, listed on the media regulator’s website late last week, says that puns could mislead young readers and make it more difficult to promote traditional Chinese culture.

Puns are ubiquitous in Chinese, which has countless homophones. Substituting one character for another can easily change the meaning of a phrase while barely altering the sound.

The Internet age has ushered in a new golden era for wordplay, with many online writers and commentators finding clever ways to mimic or alter traditional four-character idioms.

But the regulator warns that this can result in “cultural and linguistic chaos.” The agency says it now requires compliance with the standard use, phrasing and meanings of characters and idioms.

One example, given in the statement, noted that an advertisement had changed a single character in a standard four-character idiom that means “brook no delay,” altering its meaning to “coughing must not remain.”

The order is particularly strong regarding these idioms, which the regulator declared to be “one of the great features of the Chinese language.”

It also strongly criticized new idioms coined on Internet forums.

“It is no longer restricted to the elites or the well-educated who can play with the words and come up with puns. A migrant worker, or even a elementary student who knows how to use a computer, can join the conversation online and create his or her own puns,” she said.

Popular sayings and jokes in China rely on wordplay, making it an effective way to connect with an audience. During Lunar New Year celebrations marking the Year of the Horse, it was common to see money stacked on plush horses. “On horseback” can also mean “immediately,” creating a pun meaning “get rich now.” This type of wordplay dates back centuries.

An entire new lexicon of puns has been used online to discuss or lampoon sensitive topics or people. The term for “river crabs,” for instance, echoes the word for “harmony,” a common euphemism for censorship.

The attempt to ban puns comes as China’s government is stepping up control over the media and launching a new push to inculcate “traditional” values.

Last month, the chairman of the regulation bureau, Cai Fuchao, complained that most of the content for television, movies and publications created in China is “rubbish” and recommended concentrating on uplifting social values.

President Xi Jinping echoed this in a speech to television and film luminaries, asking that art, among other things, “uphold the Chinese spirit.”

Even so, it seems unlikely that blocking puns will have any serious long-lasting effect.

“Maybe in the short term, no one wants to be the one [to flout] the government's new rule,” said Wang. “But I don't think the rule can stop similar tweaking of words to be used in future commercials.”

Silbert is a special correspondent. Tommy Yang of The Times’ Beijing Bureau contributed to this report.

Copyright © 2014, Los Angeles Times

So I guess the reason why I can't get those "puns" is because of cultural barrier.  But I get one.

Year of the Horse.  In China, horse means good luck in getting wealthy.

So in China, if you say: "I'm riding horseback." It means: "I'm in the money!"  It's what you say when you win the lottery in China, I guess.

But that's more of a local slang rather than an idiom, I suppose.

But it is still another issue of a country trying to control the usage of language to create a Political Correct world.  And again why I believe PC is bad.  It is.  I understand the need to be polite, and a person should know how to do that and not use slurs and insulting phrases and stereotypes.  I get that.

But there doesn't need to be a law on it.  The person should know to be polite without a law.  If they don't, then yeah, they're an asshole.  

So China, I'm gonna teach you all what puns look like in American English Language.

  • Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
  • It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
  • I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
  • There was a big paddle sale at the boat store. It was quite an oar deal.
  • I like European food so I decided to Russia over there because I was Hungary. After Czech'ing the menu I ordered Turkey. When I was Finnished I told the waiter 'Spain good but there is Norway I could eat another bite'.
  • I knew a woman who owned a taser, man was she stunning!

Tada!


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

My Self Portrait

Journal Entry: Sat Dec 13, 2014, 4:33 AM


Well, I decided to give a try of drawing a picture of myself.  So if you haven't seen it...here it is...

Self Portrait in the Snow by Ghostwalker2061

And apparently since I posted it, a lot of people are giving me llamas.  

Dunno why, but, um....thanx?

Llama...an important part of life  3D Llama Badge 




  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

The Warcraft Stories

Journal Entry: Fri Dec 12, 2014, 6:35 PM


Neltharion the Worldmender by Ghostwalker2061

I wanted to repost the links to each of the stories.


Meanings:
  • Tectonic:
    • Plate tectonics
    • Relating to the structure of earth's crust and processes that take place within
    • Very significant change or development, widespread impact
    • Of or related to building or construction.
    • Large, massive
  • Divergence
    • Process of separation, parting, or bifurcation.
    • Difference or conflict of opinions.
    • Places where airflow or ocean currents diverge
    • Mathematical vector operator measuring the quantity of flux emanating from a vector field, indicating rate of mass, energy, heat or other gain/loss.
  • Tectonic Divergence
    • An area where plates move away from each-other, forming mid-ocean ridges or rift valleys.
  

Ten thousand years ago, a Dragon Aspect fell and a world was sundered. Yet that was a merely a reverberation from a deeper rift. For the Black Aspect was no longer one, but two. And so the fate of Azeroth hangs in the balance between each half, between Neltharion and Deathwing. For as one rises, the other falls.


Tectonic Divergence Series

1) Romancing the Coffer by Ghostwalker2061  [mirrors: FF]

Everyone called for his death now, all because of that monster. That monster who called himself Deathwing. And Neltharion welcomed death. For at least in death he would be freed from the mental prison, the torture. But before that, he wanted a chance to make it up to them...


2) The Hammer's Fall by Ghostwalker2061  [mirrors: FF]

There was one rule that all had to follow in the Twilight's Hammer... you serve or you die. Serve well, and you will die last. And through the whispers of the Old Gods they had found Deathwing, their greatest ally. But for his betrayal, there could be only one punishment: Neltharion had to die, so Azeroth could crumble upon his death.


3) Wrath of the Warchief by Ghostwalker2061  [mirrors: FF]

My children are slaves. So tell me now: by what right do you ask me to allow the Horde to abuse them? By what right does Garrosh make people see Deathwing when Neltharion stands before them? By what right does Garrosh endanger my world? 


4) Pandaria: Rise of the Sha (preview) by Ghostwalker2061  [mirrors: FF]

"One day, these mountains I have created will be your tomb. For your actions are poisoning the land, and that is the place that your current path will lead, Lei Shen." And so the great beast's words came to pass. Yet one lesson the beast did not teach: Pride. Perhaps the students were not ready. But when that lesson comes, we must be prepared to learn.

The new Chapter 11 is now up on fanfiction.net.

Side Stories

[none currently]


Non-Canon Side Stories

*) Murozond's Gift by Ghostwalker2061  [mirrors: FF]

Sometimes, Alexstrasza, I wish...I wish I could turn back the clock. Correct every sin I did. If you could go back, would you? Would you stop me from becoming Deathwing? If I had not been thrown into madness, then so many lives would have been spared. Just to have that chance...


Illustrations

*) Neltharion Gallery by Ghostwalker2061


Credits

NeltharionDeathwing, and Warcraft copyright (c) Blizzard Entertainment.

Earth-Warder Pandaren Portrait by Ghostwalker2061

And I would like to thank renndor for helping out.

He is cute.  And he weighs over 13 million metric tons.  Nel is FAT!




  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Baron Sabelmane

Journal Entry: Fri Dec 12, 2014, 2:23 AM


Aka Sabellian.

Let's talk about this guy for a moment.

 photo f1eb5429-ea8f-4a27-bd53-d2a0c13d943c_zpseac95bf4.jpg

Sabellian is Neltharion's son, one of his many children.  We all suspect that his mother is also Sintharia, of course.  But that appears not to be the case.  According to Blizzard, Sabellian was in fact half brother to Onyxia and Nefarian.  Meaning, he has a different mother, which also means...

Sabellian may have been born BEFORE Neltharion's corruption into Deathwing.  Before Deathwing killed most of his other consorts during his wild mating spree.  How far before, it's not stated.  It could have been two years, ten years, a thousand...dunno...

But it does add something interesting into the mix.

He was first introduced in Beyond the Dark Portal in which Deathwing calls upon his flight to aid Teron Gorefiend, a Death Knight of Ner'zhul, to aid in the search for magical artifacts, which would later be used to open up lots of portals that caused Draenor to become Outland.

So here's what wowpedia.org has to say...

Beyond the Dark Portal

WoW-novel-logo-16x62.png This section concerns content exclusive to the Warcraft novels or short stories.

During the black dragonflight's alliance with Ner'zhul's Horde, Sabellian and his brethren transported the orc chieftains Fenris WolfbrotherTagar Spinebreaker, and a small party of orcs to Menethil Harbor, on their way to retrieve the Jeweled Scepter of Sargeras. Once the artifacts were secured he followed Deathwing to the orcs' homeworld of Draenor.

Once on Draenor, the black dragons settled into the Gorgrond and Frostfire Ridge. They were not there long before they were attacked by Gruul, his offspring, and a small group of Alliance Expedition fighters. The eggs were destroyed and Deathwing was forced to flee from battle, followed immediately by Sabellian.

The Burning Crusade

TBC This section concerns content exclusive to The Burning Crusade.

Deathwing managed to return to Azeroth, but Sabellian remained behind on Draenor — now Outland. He is a fierce enemy of Gruul the Dragonkiller and Gruul's seven sons, and hates them deeply for killing Sabellian's own people and children.

Sabellian has admitted that he counts Rexxar as one of his friends, though he has not revealed to Rexxar that he is a black dragon.

He communicates regularly with Samia Inkling through Baron Sablemane's Blackwhelp.

Sabellian wears the guise of Baron Sablemane. He is a level 72 (elite) quest giver located outside the Circle of Blood in the contested territory of Blade's Edge Mountains -- the land that was created as a merger of Frostfire Ridge and Gorgrond. He assists adventurers in killing two of Gruul's sons: Gorgrom the Dragon-Eater and Goc, reverting to his true dragon form and personally fighting the latter.


Currently he and the black dragons under him remain in OutlandWrathion is unaware of their continued existence.[3]


Okay, so we've covered the lore side....here's what he's doing in my stories.

Where is Sabellian now?

“ Neltharion thought of his other black dragons who were not here, Siderion and his sister Nameria, his son Sabellian, and his flight in Outland.  Though, he made his own decision not to bring them here.  Sabellian, due to their now very rough relationship, of course would not answer the call of his father even if Neltharion begged him.  ”

Excerpt From: 明日香二. “Wrath of the Warchief” iBooks.

So, that gives us an idea.

Sabellian wants nothing to do with Neltharion.  And can you blame him?  Look what happened in Beyond the Dark Portal.


His mighty wings unfurled again, his claws spasming open to release both Gruul and the skull, and Deathwing took to the air, his wings beating hard as he fled the mountains. Khadgar's legs, which had been shaking, finally collapsed and he sat on the ground for a long moment, gasping and acutely aware that he'd just been terribly, terribly lucky.
With their father and ruler gone, the remaining black dragons seemed to lose heart and focus. One of the larger creatures abandoned the fight immediately, his body covered with heavy gashes and one wing bent at an odd angle.
"Father," he cried, leaning back to snap at where the smaller gronn had his tail in a death grip. "Father, wait for me!"
Spitting magma, the dragon burned the gronn's hands until he released his hold, then took off after Deathwing. With the horror that was Deathwing forced into retreat, the ogres and the gronn seemed to go mad for slaughter.

Yeah, Sabellian isn't happy with what Deathwing did.  He basically abandoned Sabellian on Draenor...that then broke apart and became Outland.

And then there's Neltharaku, aka Nel Jr. as I like to call him.

 photo 574507ff-4adf-4b28-8666-012a4eab7ac7_zps8495cf2e.jpg

Yes, I know this is the image for Netherspite, I just like it so much I'll use it as a substitute for Junior.

Junior is the leader of the Netherwings.  And yes, he was mentioned in Rise of the Sha.

“I…haven’t thought about that,” said Neltharion, dipping his head down.
“You know, I don’t care about them,” said Ruthian. “Because they want to have nothing to do with us.  Despite the fact that many of the Netherwings are brothers and sisters of ours…”
“One of them being his actual son,” said Serinar, motioning to Neltharion. “And naming himself very similar to his…”
“Neltharaku,” said Ruthian. “But again, just like Sabellian, Neltharaku wants nothing to do with any of us.”
“Man, no one wants anything to do with us,” said Serinar. “Right, Gramps?”

Excerpt From: 明日香二. “Rise of the Sha.” iBooks.

So, we basically have two sons of Neltharion who pretty much don't want anything to do with him.  Or the current cured flight either.

So, how do we solve this problem?  How can we bring these two guys together to meet with Nel?

Why not force them into the situation?

My friend Rockgod44 came up with something interesting.

Try setting up a situation that forces Sabellian to approach Nel for help, such as Garrosh kidnapping his mate to provide mounts for the Dragonmaw or somesuch. I think it is safe to say that Sabel's anger for Nel is overshadowed by his commitment to the safety of what remains of his brood. Sabel's connection to Neltharion is simply too big to not expand upon more than stating that the guy hates him.

This is an interesting concept.  I am thinking about doing the whole Garrosh becomes the hero of Draenor by rebuilding Draenor using Neltharion's powers.  What if Garrosh had Zaela kidnap Neltharion's kids, both from the Outland Black Dragons and the Netherwings...and both Sabellian and Neltharaku are forced to go to their father for help?

Hell, we could even do something worse...have Sabellian and Neltharaku ask Nel for help but it ending up being a trap for Neltharion...without Sabellian nor Neltharaku's knowledge...but both not really giving two shits about Big Daddy Nel...and throwing him to the wolves anyways?  Using his capture as what they need to get their loved ones out.  And then, the shit happens.

I kinda figured that trying to link Neltharion's heart to Draenor may be something similar to the blackout that happened to Neltharion in the Sha.  As in, Neltharion blacks out, and so does his whole flight...especially Neltharaku and Sabellian and their flights.  Because...though Neltharaku is a Netherdragon, he's basically a mutated black dragon.  They all are.  

And they find out that...maybe leaving big daddy there wasn't the best idea, especially when Draenor looks like it's suffering another cataclysm, a reverse destruction, but one that will basically look just about destructive.  Hell, Azeroth could be facing some big shit too, with Neltharion now having his powers tied to two planets and not just one.

And this maybe how I could bring about Warlords of Draenor.

Hell, this could be the thing that brings in the Burning Legion due to well...Neltharion, being one of those shields that kept the Burning Legion away for the longest times...well that could bring them there too.  

Just throwing around some stupid ideas.  Because I do want to eventually bring in Neltharaku and Sabellian to the story.

And yes, I'll do a drawing of Neltharion meeting Neltharaku and Sabellian someday.


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Pandaria Rise of the Sha chpt 11

Journal Entry: Thu Dec 11, 2014, 3:59 AM


Okay, I have now posted the new chapter to Rise of the Sha.

Rise of the Sha Chpt 11

And I would like to thank renndor for helping me out on some of the dialog.

We both spent a the last three nights doing this.

Neltharion the Worldmender by Ghostwalker2061


All for the SQUISHY!

He is so cute.

But anyways, this gives us a chance to have two of the faction leaders, Garrosh Hellscream for the Horde and Varian Wrynn for the Alliance explain to people who have never met him, who and what Neltharion is.

But they tell it from their point of view.  So they will say a lot of different things about Neltharion.  They'll say why they don't like him.  Really it's their biased opinions on Neltharion to Ji Firepaw and Aysa Cloudsinger.  

And both have their reasons for wanting to keep an eye on Neltharion.

So, hope this will be an interesting read.  It is dialog heavy, but it has to be.


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Merging Warlords of Draenor with Pandaria?

Journal Entry: Tue Dec 9, 2014, 10:07 PM


Kinda funny about this one, but my Math Nut has suggested that this might be an interesting route to take.

We end up merging the Mists of Pandaria storyline with Warlords of Draenor.

 photo WoDLogo_zps700a1646.png

Well, this is how he suggested it.

That could be changed up.
…in the AU
Even the Siege of Orgrimmar could occur at a different time.
Perhaps after the Iron Horde.
If he deals with his character flaws better than Nel does with his.
If you want him to throw more forces against Nel
So Garrosh might not be deposed until later.
Or openly use the Sha energies until later.

And...

 It'd be possible to interleave the two, spread them out in time.
Garrosh has a strong motivation to seek more forces
Given that Nel trashed a lot of Horde territory.
Warlords could tie in the reactor element, either on the Draenor or Outland sides. Or even on Azeroth.
Had a thought in one of the emails, but it’d be possible for Garrosh to try and use Nel as the power source instead of the Sha.
He’d only fall back to the Sha once Nel got free.

Pandaria would probably continue as-is
…for a little bit.
But Garrosh would meet Kairoz.
Which might shed some light on the Timeless Isle and what’s going on with the Bronze/Infinite flight.
And Nozdormu.
But that could create the bridge to alt-draenor.
The horde has 3 “new” lands they could leverage
1) Pandaria
2) Outland
3) alt-Draenor
Nobody is paying attention to #2
#3 is not known to the other characters in-universe.
…yet
Nel could be captured at any point via the steam explosion
Just requires him to make himself very vulnerable, like with a drinking contest.
So there’s a great deal of flexibility.
…on when that could align.
All 3 of those lands could be used or interwoven.
So it may start with the Horde investigating Pandaria, as now
But they start learning a lot about Nel, finding vulnerabilities.
Meet some allies in the bronze flight
Perhaps ones that have Nozdormu’s approval.
Start investigating other paths.
This could break up the Pandaria segments into “chunks”
Perhaps splitting the Sha from the Heart
Or splitting up some of the Sha encounters.
Garrosh wants Nel, Malygos, and the other Aspects under his control.
He wants to rule Azeroth completely.
Horde ascendant.
So he’d investigate all the approaches at his disposal.
But if he didn’t need to alienate the Pandaren, he may postpone the destruction of the Vale
If he has an iron horde alternative.

So I mean, is this possible?

Should I do this?  Merge the two plotlines?  One thing I am very frustrated is the stupid time travel thing.  The whole going back in time and to another reality.  Blizzard said it doesn't want to address certain issues that actually SHOULD be addressed, like both the Alliance and the Horde having Warlocks on their team.  Green orcs.  Durotan being too accepting of Thrall and his team and not question where the fuck he got Doomhammer or Orgrim's armor.

Hell, the way I am playing Garrosh in my story, to be this very cunning and subtle villain and highly intelligent.  Not as direct as he is in the game.  This is an evolution of Garrosh due to Neltharion being there.  

This is why having Squishy here is awesome.

The Black's Rage by Ghostwalker2061

Basically, one of my thoughts on the matter was not to go to Draenor's past and alternate reality, but rather have Garrosh be seen as a hero in the eyes of many orcs as a means to once more regain power within the Horde itself after the trial in Pandaria as detailed in War Crimes.


And how he would do that is of course find a way to harness Neltharion's power in order to heal his broken world Outland.

As in, Garrosh Hellscream will use the power of a Dragon Aspect to remake Draenor.  He would be seen as a hero among his people, no doubt, further putting the scorn upon Thrall and the weak New Horde.

And perhaps this is what he does to create the Iron Horde.  Rather than going back in time, he creates it from the orcs still left on Outland.  He could perhaps still attempt to go back in time to gain more troops.  Maybe bringing Grommash Hellscream, Blackhand, Kalrog, Ner'zhul forward to help him lead this new Iron Horde on the slowly being remade Draenor.

He could show them what Draenor is now like in the present and current Tectonic Divergence reality, which will help fuel the fire and hatred they will have for those who helped make Outland...Outland.

And well, this goes for Neltharion as well.

Garrosh preview by Ghostwalker2061



A little excerpt of Chapter 11.

     

“The list of crimes Deathwing has committed against the Horde, against the people of Azeroth are unbounded,” he said. “Most call him the Worldbreaker because he broke this world—twice over.”

Garrosh’s eyes narrowed.

“Yet there was another world he helped break as well. My world, my home. Once it was a world of plenty, where my people lived as warriors, hunters— pride in our hearts. Then it was ripped apart, turned into a shattered, inhospitable wreck. My people lost and purposeless.”

Ji’s eyes widened and his jaw slacked.

“Many only blame Ner’zhul, but he was just a puppet,” Garrosh continued. “The one who gave him the means, the one pulling the strings, was Deathwing.  I will never forget the day my home was destroyed with my own eyes, under my own feet. I fear the same fate will befall Pandaria if Deathwing is not stopped.”

“How can we fight against such a beast?” Ji asked.

“With subtly and precision,” Garrosh replied. “We cannot afford to draw him out in open combat.  I bore witness to that folly and I am forever wiser.  After our glorious victory over Theramore, he struck and commanded the ground itself to open up and swallow my troops.  Only a few survived. We must plan our actions carefully because his eyes and ears are everywhere.  I need allies, I need information, I need resources.  Deathwing’s ash cloud has polluted the land, poisoned the food, contaminated the water. The people suffer. Pandaria can provide those things. And in return, I can save it from Deathwing!”


As you can see, Garrosh is not the same as he is in the game.

So what do you think I should do?  Should I merge them, should I keep them separate?  Should I just go crazy?

I will say this, the ending story though, the one that I'm building up to will be the return of the Burning Legion.

 photo sarg_zpse86215a7.jpg

Sooner or later, Sargeras is going to come.  And Neltharion will at last have the battle he was built for.

Neltharion vs. Sargeras!

Taking all bets!


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Varian Wrynn and Goldrinn

Journal Entry: Mon Dec 8, 2014, 9:27 PM


Okay, maybe some of you can tell me something...

Lo'Gash and Varian.

I know that Lo'Gash is the Tauren name for Goldrinn, the Ancient wolf spirit in Kalimdor.  He was responsible for basically creating the Worgen.

So, is Varian possessed by Goldrinn?  Or is he blessed by him?  Does he have the Ancient inside of him?

Does he just periodically take control and remains a separate entity?

Or is he actually inside of Varian, which means if Varian calls upon Goldrinn...he could tell Varian some ancient history that he didn't know of...

Like ancient history about Neltharion prior to the Sundering...

I have to ask this because I can't seem to find a definitive answer as to what exactly is going on inside of Varian.  Or hell what is going on with Goldrinn.

What's the relationship between these two?


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

What if Neltharion swallows a Propane tank?

Journal Entry: Mon Dec 8, 2014, 12:59 AM


If you guys ever want to see what would happen if Neltharion ate a propane tank?



Check that out.

  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

The New DeviantArt Logo

Journal Entry: Sun Dec 7, 2014, 3:25 PM


So I've been getting a lot of notes on this.  People discussing it on their blogs and such.  I might as well put my two cents in.

 photo DeviantArt_Lockup_onblack_1_zps42c4b011.png

This thing.

What do I think about this thing?

Um...

It's boring.

I did like the old dA logo.

deviantART 

You know that.

Hell this right here.

 photo ScreenShot2014-12-07at61453PM_zps0ceab537.png

Would have been a lot better than this...

 photo DeviantArt_Mark_white_1_zpsff786955.png

This crooked ≠ 

Yeah, it's a crooked unequal sign.

And I see that yeah, they've copied off of the poster from Need for Speed Most Wanted and the logo from this place called Plantzkart.  Never heard of it, but seeing the design, yeah, I see the leach.

What really got me a bit pissed was they didn't ask one of us members to do it for them.  They wanted to outside the place.

Which for me is silly.  People like to say that now they're not feeling any love for this site, that their voice doesn't count.

Guys, my voice has rarely if NEVER counted when it came to this site.  Each time they ran a contest, I never participated.  Why?  Because I know my stuff will never be shown or even mentioned.

I'm pretty good, but yeah, I never get anything.  I have one daily deviation only because I sold my sole to My Little Pony during 2011.

Kindred Spirits: Luna and Nel by Ghostwalker2061

That thing, that's my only DD.  EVER!

A few times I got some honorable mentions, or groups saying that I deserve a DD for an image, and then that trickled off to nothing.

Which I don't understand, I mean, I think my recent stuff is as worthy of a DD as that image.

The Black's Rage by Ghostwalker2061

This is an excellent moody piece.  It's one of my favorites.

So No One Can See the Tears by Ghostwalker2061

So is that one.

Nope, nothing.

For those of you who wanna gripe about whether or not you matter?  I'll tell you right now as someone who pretty much never mattered on this site.

Dude, welcome to my reality.

The logo is ugly.  Very much so, this logo us ugly.  And it's lazy.  Very lazy.

But these guys not listening to you or even noticing you or ignoring you is pretty much a status quo for me and I'm not gonna bitch about that.


I got more important things to bitch about.






  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

The August Celestials

Journal Entry: Sat Dec 6, 2014, 2:04 AM


I feel that this needs to be addressed.

The August Celestials.  They play a critical part of Pandaria's lore, serving as advisors and even trainers to the best of the best.

Xuen the White Tiger is shown training warriors at his temple, Nizao being with the Shado-Pan.

Yu'lon even had priests and priestesses with her as well as having a library dedicated to the preservation of Pandaria's rich history.

The only one that at the time doesn't have any Pandarens training under him is Chi'Ji the Red Crane.  But that's because his temple got infested with the Sha.

So let's talking about them here.

In  my story, the August Celestials are shown to be very friendly to the Dragon Aspects.  Malygos mentioning that he and Chi-Ji used to joke around.  Neltharion was good friends with Yu'lon.  That sort of thing.

According to wowpedia, the August Celestials are actually a version of Ancients much like Aviana and Cenarius.  

In the War of the Ancients Trilogy, Cenarius and Ysera are implied to have an intimate relationship with each other and it is very possible that they probably had kids.  So it is very implied that the Dragon Aspects and the Ancients probably helped each other to maintain Azeroth.

Little added Addendum.  Yes, in my story Lo'Gosh, aka Goldrinn, the Wolf Ancient is inside of Varian.  I may have him at least educate Varion of Neltharion's past a little as well.

Yes, people, Varian still has a demigod inside of him.

So let's talk about the August Celestials.

First up is Yu'lon.

 photo Yulon_TBoS_zps9b373847.jpg

Yu'lon the Jade Serpent is the embodiment of Wisdom.  We first meet her at her temple, as a Pandaren cub.  She explains that every few thousand years, she has to return to her statue to renew her powers and be reborn.  Her statue also held the Sha of Doubt under it.

She's the one who advised Emperor Shaohao during the invasion of the Burning Legion as he searched to find a way to save Pandaria from the demons and the Sundering of the World.

In my story, she's a friend of Neltharion.  She admired his wisdom.  She'll be the first that Nel will meet, and she'll tell him about his past once he asks her.  Hell, she'll even mention that the lowering of the mists was Neltharion's fault...or at least state that the actions of Deathwing helped to destroy them.  She also test the PC and Wrathion's wisdom during the legendary cloak quest.

Next up is Chi-Ji

 photo Chi-Ji_TBoS_zpse8a36033.jpg

The Red Crane is the embodiment of Hope.  Though we don't get to see him much in the game.  He had to deal with the Sha of Despair in the Krasarang Wilds.  He tells Shaohao not to give into despair either.  

In my story, Chi-Ji and Malygos were close, enjoying each other's company and telling funny stories and jokes together.

He also tests Wrathion and telling him not to lose hope...and saying that he needs to hear that more than anyone.

Nizao

 photo Niuzao_TBoS_zps91c76de0.png

The Black Ox of Fortitude.  I almost wanna call him the Ox of Endurance as well.  He's the embodiment of pretty much never giving up.  No matter how much you endure, never give up.  You fall, you fail.

Not much on this guy either from what I've read.  But he does meet Shaohao who tells him not to be afraid of the Sha of Fear when Shaohao goes beyond the Serpent's Spine.  He also tests Wrathion.

Now have Xuen

 photo Xuen_TBoS_zpsf5b2f2cb.jpg

Xuen the White Tiger is Strength.  More about him due to the fact that he's the guy who we meet to convince to open up the Vale of Eternal Blossoms.  While Taran Zhu goes against it.

He tests Wrathion as well.

But the big one here is that in my story, when we get to the scene where Anduin and Sunwalker Dezco meet Xuen at his temple, that's when I'll have Neltharion show up.

And Xuen is gonna be shocked.  Oh, and if Taran Zhu starts saying something impolite about Neltharion as well, you better believe Xuen's gonna tell him to shut his pie hole.

Mostly because of what I have plan for how we're gonna get the Vale opened.  

But basically each of these Ancients do remember Neltharion, they know who he is and what he is.  They know the other Dragon Aspects as well.

Some of you who may have read Chapter 10 probably noticed that when Neltharion thought his title would mean something so he could meet the Jade Serpent sooner, and Ren saying that..well it doesn't due to no one remembering him in Pandaria...yeah...that's gonna get flipped on its butt.

The moment Neltharion meets Yu'lon, that's when Yu'lon informs the Pandarens just who it is they're looking at.  

Not only that, but the August Celestials are gonna race over to Neltharion, probably asking him some questions too.  There's a lot that has happened to Azeroth that they don't know about due to the mists.

In a likely scenario, the August Celestials might drop everything they are doing so that they could meet up with Neltharion and the other Aspects.  And Neltharion himself has his own questions that can be revealed by the August Celestials.

One of those is the relationship between Neltharion and the Pandarens.  Or maybe what's going on with the Sha.

So, there's a lot of elements that I'm gonna put in this story.

But is there something you want me to do with the August Celestials and Neltharion as well?

I will say this, when Chi-Ji finds out that Malygos died and is now just a ghost, he's not gonna be very happy.  Like I said, they were good friends.  Not as close as Neltharion and Malygos are to each other, but still good friends.

It's like me having a fairly good friend and then finding out after a few years she just passed away.  Lots of regret on Chi-Ji's part, I'll tell yah.


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Online Role-Play

Journal Entry: Fri Dec 5, 2014, 2:30 PM


Hey guys, I guess I need to say this again.  But I don't RPG.  

Okay?  

Why?  Well, do I honestly need to give you a reason?  Here's one: "Because I don't want to!"

There's my reason.

And yes, that's great someone still show some interest in Jonathan Long, but I'm not all that interested in telling his story anymore.  He's a great character, but I'm focusing on something else right now.

So even asking me to play as Jonathan Long is an automatic NO.

I haven't really done anything with his character in 3 years.  

What's been getting my interest lately?

Neltharion the Worldmender by Ghostwalker2061

Do you honestly have to ask?




  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Pandaria Rise of the Sha chpt 10

Journal Entry: Thu Dec 4, 2014, 1:52 AM


Rise of the Sha chpt 10

Well, there we go.  The new chapter.  Don't worry, Nel isn't being suggestively raped in this one.

But now we get to Nel going to the Jade Serpent Temple.  Yup, we are moving right along.

Next Chapter is the intro of Garrosh and Varian and how they tell both Ji Firepaw and Aysa Cloudsinger their version of Neltharion's story.


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Anon Reviewers...

Journal Entry: Mon Dec 1, 2014, 12:40 AM


Again, I ask, please, if you wish to ask me a question, email me, PM me, get on ff.net and send me a note there.  Yes it will require you to make an account to do so, but that's the proper place to ask a question about specific details like that...

Asking a question like this...

I did not ask about Nel's dangly parts. I asked whether he had an anus or a cloaca. Because anuses are a mammalian trait while cloacas are traits found in just about every other land vertebrates. Giving anuses to non-mammalian creatures strikes me as lazy writing, and I was hoping you didn't fall into it.

On the reviewers page is not the proper forum for that question.  Reviewer pages are for reviews.  Tell me how you like the scene, tell me if I need to fix something, tell me I need to watch the typos...something like that.

Not ask me if Neltharion has a vent or a regular mammalian anus.  Those sorts of questions are left for private messages.  

Posting that question on the review page just makes you look lazy.  Like you don't want to take the time to go through the specific forums to ask such a question.

And questions like that on the reviewers pages get deleted and won't get answered.  Okay.  


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Animals Lack Attributes

Journal Entry: Sun Nov 30, 2014, 7:30 PM


Well, guess what?  It's December.  Yeah I know it's like two hours before December, but I'm gonna be a bit busy tomorrow, so I might as well just do it early.

So it gives me a chance to get out my Holiday Journal skin.  Put away the fall skin for another year.  I know, I thought it was neat too.  It'll be fall again.  But it is now December, and it's time for the Christmas stuff.

And well...though I enjoyed a few of the reviews I got considering the...hahahah...beginning of Chapter 9.

Please do read it if you haven't.

Rise of the Sha Chpt 9

Anyways, there is a reason why I turn on Anon reviews and well I managed to get one of those reasons.  Someone asking about Nel's dangly parts all because he read that scene.

I deleted it of course.  But...let me just say something.  Um, whatever shape or form Neltharion's dangly parts look like...that's not really the point of the scene.

Granted yeah, it was a bit steamy, but it was a bit uncomfortable.  And it's supposed to given the context.  About a couple of chapters back, Neltharion lands on the beach of Pandaria and not 2 minutes in, gets gang banged by the Sha.  Literally.  Yes you perverts, Nel's dangly bits were showing during the drive-by gang bang.  Now go take your sock and your banana scented lotion and your shame elsewhere.

But the first scene in chapter 9 is supposed to be a result of the beach scene.  As in it is meant to play on Neltharion's doubts.

Neltharion doesn't handle confusion well.  He likes his world just the way it is, and anything that disrupts it kinda makes him go into Heroic BSOD, or worse.  Well, making Neltharion confused on whether or not Deathwing was the absolute monster he is, creates a conflict in Neltharion and of course starts generating doubt.

You see, the Sha look at Neltharion and they see: "Oh my god!  Look at that giant candy bar, let's go eat it!"

The Sha are sharks and Neltharion is this nice juicy piece of veil that just got thrown into the middle of their pack.  He's a giant ferrari cake and every Sha gets a piece!

Nel is very tasty.  So the Sha of Doubt which will show up later, is gonna have some fun with Nel, creating confusion and doubt by making him remember things from his past that well he put a mental block on.  And that scene was one of them.  

Deathwing is a sick fuck, but he uses various techniques to achieve his end result.  And well, being tender with Nel is one of those techniques.  Yeah, Neltharion can now add Stockholm Syndrome to the list of various mental disorders he's got.  Stockholm Syndrome is when the captive starts seeing his or her kidnapper, rapist, abuser...as basically their friend and yes, even their lover.  

And it is probably one of the good reasons why rape victims if they've been held in captivity by their rapist and their rapist does exactly what Deathwing did in the scene, why more often trials often are their to accuse the victim than the rapist.  And that's what happens here.  And it's as sick and twisted as you might thing.

But for the idiot who wanted to discuss Nel's dangly bits, if you wanna ask me an important question don't be lazy and use the Anon button.

Also...look in between Nel's legs in this picture.

The Earth Warder, Dragon Shaman by Ghostwalker2061

Does that answer your question?  Yeah, people, I do make my dragons anatomically correct.  And it is probably the one thing I can applaud Roland Emmerich on when he made Godzilla 1998.  Because for the first time, we had an anatomically correct Godzilla.

Why do I do it?  Because whether or not we wanna admit...animals do have attributes.  Guess what?  So do we?  And yes, when I had to sketch the nude male model in college, I had to draw his dangly bits.  

So grow up, guys.  Just enjoy the scene for the emotional filled and disturbing scene that it is.  And if I did disturb you because of that scene, good.  If you were disturbed, then that scene did what it was supposed to do.


  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke

Polish Town Bans Winnie the Pooh

Sat Nov 29, 2014, 10:16 PM
Oh god...I'm gonna just post the article and fuck everything else.  

Winnie the Pooh may be loved by children everywhere, but the willy nilly silly old bear stuffed with fluff has caused quite a huff in a Polish community.

The British newspaper The Independent reports that councillors in the town of Tuszyn have punted Pooh as a possible playground patron because of his "dubious sexuality" and "inappropriate" dress.

Illustrations of the bear created by British author A.A. Milne in the 1920s confirm Pooh does tend to wander the Hundred Acre Wood in the buff or squeezed into the teensiest of red T-shirts.

"The problem with that bear is it doesn't have a complete wardrobe," Coun. Ryszard Cichy is quoted as saying.

"It is half naked which is wholly inappropriate for children. 1/8Poland's fictional bear 3/8 is dressed from head to toe, unlike Pooh, who is only dressed from the waist up."

An unnamed councillor denounced poor Pooh as a "hermaphrodite" -- although the official may have meant the bear was androgynous.

"It doesn't wear underpants because it doesn't have a sex."

The comments of the officials were sneakily recorded by a councillor and leaked to local media, according to the Croatian Times.

Tigger and Eeyore would doubtless not be amused.

Milne named Pooh for a teddy bear owned by his son, who was the basis for the bear's friend, Christopher Robin, in the stories.

The boy had in turn named his toy after a Canadian black bear he often saw at the London Zoo. The bear cub had been purchased from a hunter by Canadian Lt. Harry Colebourn in White River, Ont., while he was en route to England during the First World War.

Colebourn named the bear Winnie after his adopted hometown of Winnipeg. Colebourn left Winnie at the London Zoo while he and his unit were in France.



Read more: www.ctvnews.ca/world/polish-to…

*sigh*

IT'S A FUCKING TEDDY BEAR!!!

What is wrong with this world?!  Winnie the Pooh is one of the last innocent things on this good green Earth, and this person wants to ruin it for the rest of us.

We don't deserve this existence.



  • Listening to: Thriller (cover) by LoveCrave
  • Reading: Mass Effect 3 Times as Different
  • Watching: The Time Machine I found at a Yard Sale
  • Playing: Plants vs. Zombies
  • Eating: Rice
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke